We are driven by fear of what we could lose

Although I think of myself as a logical thinking person – able to separate my decision making from the emotions I’m feeling at the time, like a stoic – I’ve been voraciously consuming information about COVID-19 and the state of business in the nation.

I justify consuming the info because I tell myself it’s relevant to me and my business. Because I, like everyone, is fearful of contracting COVID-19 and becoming a burden to others, but also because it’s having such a permanent mark on our nation’s history – and we’re watching all of it happen and unfold in front of our eyes.

In New York, Andrew Cuomo has been doing daily briefings on the state of NY’s hospitals, emergency workers, data on the burden on our first responders, etc.

He made a remarkable statement for a politician in the middle of a crises. At least, remarkable to me.
One, it was a statement about how he was wrong – and in admitting he was wrong he used it as a teachable moment for everyone who cared to listen.
Two, it wasn’t about any of the data he was reporting, which he’s been pretty transparent about sharing it with everyone, it was about how he thought he was too busy to spend time with his mother before this pandemic.

She would invite him over for coffee and he would always say he was “busy.” “Something came up and I can’t make it over…”


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As you’ll hear on tomorrow’s episode of #TheMarieForleoPodcast, I’m obsessed with his #dailybriefings. ⁣ ⁣ One of my fav. parts of this clip is when he says, “Wrong. Wrong.” I mean *when* does a politician call himself out for his personal shortcomings and then turn it into a teachable moment?? 😭😭😭⁣ ⁣ This is about finding as many growth lessons as we can from this thing. Governor, you are SPOT. ON. Thank you 🙏 #dailybriefingsforever Tag your loved ones to let them know you’re thinking of them. 💌⁣ ⁣ Also, pls do *not* make this about politics b/c its not. It’s about a universal human experience.💗✌🇮🇹⁣ ⁣ ⁣ #lessonslearned #everythingisfigureoutable #marieforleo #staystrong #stayhealthy #quarantinelife #mondaymotivation #maketime #lovewins⁣

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He also remarked that being able to have conversations that lasted hours vs minutes with his kids has revealed that his kids – surprise – have complex lives. Simply asking “How are you? Do you need anything? When do I get to see you next?” Was not really accomplishing the fatherly duties and parental responsibilities that he though they were.

And now that he can’t hang out with his mother, because she is in older population that is more vulnerable to the Corona virus, and he’s a higher risk person due to the amount of people that he sees, the amount of regret that he feels is impressive because now he realizes that since it’s taken away from him, he’s more motivated than ever to get back what was taken from him.

Humans, as a species, are more motivated by fear of losing something than the excitement of gaining something.

It’s why gamblers, who were down $200 at one point, and come back to “only” lose $25 feel more relief than the gambler who was up $200 at one point and is now “only” up $25.

Have you ever felt this?

We have an opportunity right now – all of us – to truly take stock in what we want now that most of it has been taken away from us.
We also have an opportunity to become aware of the things that we didn’t actually need.

I’ve been inundated with messages from people saying how much they miss the gym and how they can’t wait to get back.

The same people, when the gym was open, would also complain to me how traffic was really tough that day and it was tough getting to the gym. They would complain that it was hard to eat on a diet and life was busy, etc etc

Now that the gym was taken away, I basically hear “Wait! No!!!! Not the gym!! Now that I can’t go there, I feel like I have to go 10X more”

I’m not saying that they’re terrible people – I’m just trying to point out – if you’re jonesing for the gym, or to talk with your Mom, or to go on walks outside, or to read more – make it a priority. Block time out. Hold yourself accountable to the things that really matter to you.

You may never see an opportunity to evaluate what’s important in your life like this again. It’s your time to make your life the one you want. It’s like we’re all getting a reset button on our daily habits.

And while I know the business landscape will be forever changed after this, and “working out” may look different when we’re all eased out of quarantine, talking to your Mom or Dad or kids will always be important.

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